Rest in Peace, Mixael de Kock

Dearest Mixael

Mixael de Kock

Mixael de Kock

You were not an old friend of mine – in fact our friendship was at that nascent stage between acquaintanceship and friendship.  We were just learning to know one another’s innermost thoughts, histories and just starting to create our own shared history.  There will be no further shared history.

Roses in Mixael's garden

Roses in Mixael’s garden

We had just progressed past meeting exclusively at theatres and other events. I was just starting to care about you as a person, to know your private pains and joys. I met your family, some of your friends, made roses for your father.  We laughed at the foibles of our family members where they were similar and refrained from family disloyalties because we still didn’t know each other that well.  Now we never will.

Mixael's dogs

Mixael’s dogs

I enjoyed the real roses from your garden, the pictures of which you posted so often on Facebook.  These roses gave you pleasure.  I also loved your collection of roosters, cock for de Kock,  I found it amusing.  Mixael, I may never see a beautiful rose again without thinking of you but I will certainly never see a rooster again without thinking of Mixael de Kock.

Mixael de Kock loved his Cocks

Mixael de Kock loved his Cocks

As I sat in your dining room on Christmas Eve last year and spoke about the fact that 2012 was the first Christmas you had celebrated since the awful attack which left you nearly blind, we pledged to make this an annual tradition.  Turns out that it was a one-off.  It will never become a tradition – “our special time together”.

Christmas Eve dinner with Mixael de Kock, this is his orange and butternut soup garnished with fennel

Christmas Eve dinner with Mixael de Kock, this is his orange and butternut soup garnished with fennel

I was just learning the names of your beloved dogs.  I was still a stranger in your beautiful home.  I now will never be that close house friend who has the run of the house.  I will not celebrate my sixtieth birthday there as we discussed.

More roses

More roses

You will be missed, not only by your family, your “old friends”, but also by those of us who were on the periphery of your life – those who like me were just drifting into the friendship stage, perhaps to make it to that status, perhaps to hover there a while and fall away.

Mixael de Kock 10

As I join the throng of people making their farewells to you I share their pain at your passing because you chose to let me into your life, even though my sojourn there was so brief.  Thank you, Mixael, for everything you were for that brief time.  That authenticity that is so rare.  I will miss you, now and until we meet again.

Rest in Peace, Mixael de Kock

Much love


About moirads

Clergy person, theatre and music lover, avid reader, foodie. Basically, I write about what I do, where I go and things I love (or hate).
This entry was posted in Music, Personal stories, South African Culture, Theatre and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s